Codependency Therapy
Break free from painful relationship patterns, rediscover who you are, and get your life back.
Is this you?
You lose yourself in your relationships, sacrificing your wants and interests while focusing on your partner’s.
You feel responsible for fixing everyone else's problems, but tend to minimize and ignore your own needs.
You get stuck in unhealthy relationships, because walking away feels selfish or mean.
You feel exhausted, invisible, resentful, and lost, but don’t know how to fix it.
If this sounds like you, you’re not alone. In fact, you’re like many people I’ve helped over the years.
Change is possible.
How Therapy Helps
Therapy is, to oversimplify it, about letting go of old thinking and behavior patterns that don’t serve us while learning new ones that do.
I’ve come to see therapy as a mix of science and art. The science is the techniques and tools, developed from research and years of practice. The art is in working to understand my clients and tuning my approach to fit them and who they are.
Through our work together, past clients have learned to:
Stand up for themselves in relationships without guilt and fear.
Be a loving, supportive partner in a way that’s healthy and sustainable.
Get clarity about their wants, values, and identity, as well as a happier life that’s more aligned with those things.
Create more balance in their lives, so there’s time and space not just for the people they care about, but for themselves, too.
“ I have been able to move my life forward, stop fearing failure and judgement, identify and move away from negative relationships, and feel like myself again for the first time in a long time.”
-GB
The When, Where, and How
I see clients virtually (via phone or video) throughout California. (In-person 'walk & talk' sessions are also available if you're in the Sacramento area.)
Generally, we have weekly or bi-weekly appointments, but asynchronous support via secure messaging can be added on as well.
While I don’t take insurance directly, I can provide a superbill for out of network reimbursement.
HSA funds can also generally be used to pay for sessions.
FAQ
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I help clients recognize and change codependent patterns in all their relationships—with partners, family members, friends, and even at work. We'll explore the roots of these patterns and I'll help you develop healthier ways to connect while maintaining your sense of self.
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When people start honoring themselves, their needs, and their values, it usually becomes clear which relationships were built on genuine connection, and which ones required them to be someone they're not.
The real ones stay. The exhausting ones ... well, it’s usually a relief to be free of them. -
It depends (I hate the vagueness of that answer, but it's the honest one.) For some clients, it's just a few months while they tackle a specific challenge. For others it's longer-term, because they value the ongoing support of having a trusted advisor help them navigate through life.
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The research done on this topic indicates they’re as effective, or possibly even a bit more effective. For phone sessions, some people find it more comfortable to open up and dig into challenging topics than they would in a face-to-face situation.
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At the risk of sounding vague, the reality is that it can vary quite a bit, depending on a number of factors (frequency of sessions, asynchronous support, out-of-network coverage). Pricing is always something we discuss in a consultation call so you have a clear idea of what to expect before you commit.
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Under California law, everything in our sessions (including the fact that we're having them) is confidential unless there are safety concerns or you give me permission to share information about our sessions with someone else.
“Limiting patterns that have plagued me my entire life have finally begun to dissolve. At first, I wondered if the cost would be worth it. Looking back, I find it hard to overstate the value of those sessions.”
-DT
Meet Steve
As a sensitive kid who grew up in a home with substance abuse and instability, I'm intimately familiar both with how codependency shapes our lives and the hurt, resentment and burnout it leads to. That experience, and my recovery journey, were significant influences in my decision to become a psychotherapist.
Over 20+ years of working as a counselor, therapist, and coach, I’ve been grateful for the opportunity to help hundreds of people learn how to build healthy, connected relationships built on balance and mutual respect. It’s a privilege I don’t take lightly.
Outside of work, you can probably find me reading, playing games, helping the dogs at our local shelters, making music, or out on my paddleboard at a nearby lake.
What’s Next?
I know it can be challenging to find a therapist who's a good fit, and you can only tell so much from a website. If what you’ve read here resonates with you, I’d welcome the opportunity to connect and see if I can be of help.
Whatever path your journey takes, I hope it's one that connects you to yourself and a life that feels more confident, empowered, and true to you. Keep moving forward.